|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
email: info@wllovillage.org
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note: This is a long newsletter, click the link at the very top that says, 'View this email in your browser'. Enjoy reading what's new and newsworthy with WLLO!
|
|
This month's articles
(click on the title link to jump directly to the article):
|
|
Lessons for 70 and beyond
A superpower of older age: Powerlessness
by Anne Lamott
I woke up yesterday without too much going on except a cold and cough I’ve had for two weeks, and of course the whole world coming apart like a two-dollar watch. Also, beauty everywhere: clouds descended from the ridge into folds in the hills like puffs and swoops of light gray smoke. I went to wash my face with my glasses still on, and felt like I was in a carwash. For a minute, I believed I had a detached retina — I’ve had a floater for two years, and my ophthalmologist has told me to be on the lookout for changes in vision. I got things sorted and took my morning meds, but then five minutes later was not positive that I had indeed taken them or just meant to.
I caught up on all the ghastly news and then as a counterpoint sat down on the floor to play with the cat. Quiet joy and peace. Then, ring ring ring.
It was a great old friend from childhood calling to say he was hurt by something I’d done. He insisted I had dissed him to an unnamed friend. I expressed how terrible I felt that this had hurt him, and that it was a dumb misunderstanding, and how much I loved him, and asked if we could get together to talk it through, but he said no, he wasn’t ready.
I was stunned. I sat there awhile, partly to think about how to win him back and get him to forgive me but also because to get up from being seated on the floor, I need either a hand or some furniture to lean on, and found neither. I started to do a sowbug, roly-poly move that I’ve developed, where I roll to my side and push up off the ground, but instead I lay there, sad aged old misunderstood sowbug me.
My reflex was to mount a defense. My Jesuit friend Tom Weston once said that he never noticed he was angry, just that he was right, and I acknowledged to my husband that I was both. He shrugged, smiling: Yep. Then I looked at my part in it and, yes, I could see why my friend felt as he did, and shame flickered. But I hadn’t wronged him.
Any loved one’s anger at me feels life-threatening at first. I waited for him to call and straighten things out, but he didn’t. After a while, I rolled awkwardly to my feet like a ton of bricks, went to the kitchen and was eating my body weight in cheese when something suddenly came to me.
It was a dawning realization that this problem was, with a little time, going to sort itself out. I almost smote my forehead. Yo! That had not occurred to me. It was going to be okay. I actually smiled. This is one superpower of being old: You know that things are probably going to work out without your tense, controlling input. Maybe you won’t get your way, which I hate, but the roiled ponds of misunderstanding and hurt will settle.
Older age gives us the knowledge of how powerless we are — not helpless so much but with little control over life’s results. I don’t love this. You come to forks in the road where you think, I can’t bear this, I can’t do this, I can’t fix this; I see no reason for hope. Plus, what if Iran gets involved, and what if there’s a nuclear exchange, and what if this is the end?
But then, if you are old, you remember countless other falling-outs, other miserable patches with people you love, where peace was restored. I believe in the resiliency of relationships, even if I struggle not to be initially devastated every time I disappoint someone.
This is the main advice I give younger people who get troubled and stuck. I say, “Yes, it sounds really awful. Just do one good thing, and then another, and breathe. You’re going to be okay.” I tell them what John Lennon said: “Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.”
So I got on with the day, trusting again that, as my husband says, life tilts towards the good.
Rain clouds were gathering, stage left, and a wind began to blow, so I pulled on a thick turtleneck sweater, forgetting to first take off my glasses, which caught in the fabric, trapped me and stabbed me in the eye. (Come to think of it, maybe I am fine and the glasses are the problem.)
I have a number of close friends in their 80s whom I see regularly, some of them quite infirm. On bad days, they say angrily that old age sucks. This is part of the package. We stick together. Ram Dass said that ultimately we are all just walking each other home.
It began to pour, and the branches of the bigger trees whipped and bowed and the more delicate ones moved their arms gently, port de bras.
I waited some more for the friend who’d called to come crawling back to me in a phone call or text. I grew increasingly uptight. Grappling with big life stuff can be too much, so I looked around at my little plot where heart and soul live, and tended to that: tea and clean sheets on the bed. After decades of the bashing, crashing, moaning and groaning, one gets too tired to keep doing this. I was tired.
And it was good.
I released my friend to his own process. When you’re young and vigorous, convinced you are powerful, you have the energy to try to self-will your problems into submission, and it usually makes them worse. By 60 or so, you’ve had enough of participating in the Punch and Judy show of trying to get things to turn out the way you’re positive they should. You’ve learned to surrender. Otherwise, you’ll always be pissed off and exhausted, and that’s no way to live out whatever years you have left.
By dusk, I was less pissed off and exhausted. The rain had stopped. There has been no word from my friend, but I assume there will be, in the fullness of time. But what were the options? I sat back down on the floor with the cat, my home-care nurse. The milky sky was pulling itself down over the ridge like a theatrical scrim, a play of cloud and hillside intermingling. There was a feeling of stasis in the weather — enough with the rain, it seemed to say; let’s all stay quiet and steady, which reflected exactly how I felt. Projection perhaps but, at any rate, I sowbugged my way with a certain goofy grace to a standing position, then all but raised my arms in triumph, a gymnast after a decent landing.
* * * * *
|
|
|
MEET PAMELA BERG
 Meet Pam Berg, WLLO member since 2023. You might know Pam by her lovely British accent, even after living in the US for 63 years.
Born in 1942, in Reading (50 miles west of London) Pam’s early memories are rationing during wartime and sharing her family’s small home with another family. (Her father was in the Royal Air Force as was the other family’s father). Entertainment for the children in their cramped space included playing catch by tossing food across the room to one another.
Life was simpler then and Pam recalls a happy childhood (she was quite independent), riding bikes and being adventurous. There were few toys, and rationing continued even after the war.
Pam attended Luckley School for Girls, a small, private, and partial boarding school. Her schoolmates included many children of diplomats whose families worked in London. This diversity allowed Pam to meet Americans, Europeans, and others, which fed her call to adventure.
Pam knew she wanted to go into the medical field, but she also wanted to avoid too much blood. After deciding against Physical Therapy, Pam discovered the field of Orthoptics — which is diagnosing and treating eye movement disorders in children, including amblyopia and strabismus. Pam received her certification from the Oxford Eye Hospital, and her first job landed her in Brighton, a coastal town south of London. After nine months, Pam took a job in Los Angeles. She laughingly recalls getting off the plane in her wool black and white checked, Chanel type suit, with her flaming pink jersey coat and being hit with sunny 80-degree weather; her greeters were two girls wearing shorts and flip flops. A bit of climate and culture shock!
After completing her two-year contract in Los Angeles, Pam was offered and accepted the opportunity to purchase her own clinic in Whittier California. She spent the next 42 years in California. When she decided to move to Portland in 2004, her professional connections helped her land her job at the Casey Eye Institute. LA was losing its luster, and the traffic was terrible.
True to her adventurous spirit, Pam has traveled to Nepal, Thailand, Brazil, and Africa. Of course, she’s also been back to England numerous times to visit relatives and friends.
Pam is passionate about the arts. Pam’s father was an architect and her maternal grandmother who became a patron of Drury Lane Theatre, famous for its’ wonderful musicals. In the sixties, Pam became friends with a designer who introduced her to all kinds of art activities, and she then became an avid art collector and patron.
Not surprisingly, Pam has been recognized both in her career and her contributions to the arts. In 2002, she won a yearly Arts Award in LA for her contributions to art and artists. In 2018, Pam’s peers awarded her the Lancaster Award, the highest honor in Orthoptics. Part of the reason for this was her long-time interest in Vision Screening for preschoolers for the early detection of amblyopia.
Retired in 2014 and now living in Mountain Park, Pam and her cat Willa are busy settling into her new home. She has been able to enlist the help of WLLO volunteers and other friends to help her pack (and unpack) her many pieces of art and large collection of books for the move
Thanks to Becky Crew for this article!
|
|
 Reminder to WLLO Members
We are having trouble returning calls you have made to the WLLO office. Since our office is ‘virtual,’ volunteers return your call from their personal phones. Some of them have non-Oregonian area codes, which means you might see a number you don’t recognize. These calls are not spam—they’re simply our volunteers trying to reach you. If you’re expecting a response from WLLO, please answer calls from unfamiliar numbers right after leaving a message so we can assist you promptly.
WLLO Volunteers: We Need Your Unique Talents!
Join Us in Making a Difference Beyond Service Requests
The heart of WLLO has always been our dedicated volunteers who go above and beyond to create a supportive, caring community. As we continue to grow and look for new ways to serve our members, we are reaching out for help with some important services that make a meaningful impact.
Send Cheer with Get Well Cards
Life brings ups and downs, and sometimes a simple gesture can mean the world. We’re looking for volunteers to help us send get well cards to members who are ill or recovering. If you enjoy crafting messages of hope and kindness, your involvement will brighten someone’s day and remind them they’re part of our WLLO family.
Annual Party Support: Set Up and Clean Up Crew Needed
Our annual party in late April is a highlight of the year, bringing members together to celebrate and connect. To make this event a success, we need helping hands for both set up and clean up. Whether you have an eye for decoration or simply want to pitch in, your assistance is crucial in creating a welcoming space and ensuring a smooth event from start to finish.
Connect with Members Who Can’t Attend Regular Functions
Not everyone can join us for our regular gatherings. Some members may be homebound, have scheduling conflicts, or simply prefer more personal connections. We are seeking volunteers to check in, form relationships, and provide companionship to these members. A phone call, a note, or a friendly visit can build bonds and ensure no one feels isolated or left out.
How You Can Help
· Volunteer to send get well cards—materials and guidance provided!
· Sign up for set up or clean up shifts at various get togethers like the Annual party.
· Become a friendly contact for members who prefer not to attend group activities.
Your time and care make all the difference. Whether you have a few hours to spare or want to take on a regular role, we welcome your involvement. Reach out to the WLLO volunteer coordinator (sued@wllovillage.org) to learn more or to sign up for any of these special services.
Together, We Build a Stronger Community
Thank you for considering these opportunities to serve. With your help, WLLO will continue to be a place where every member is valued, supported, and connected.
|
|
NO GUILT BOOK CLUB’S NEXT MEETING IS
TUESDAY, JANUARY 13 AT 10:30 AM
I n December, we had an interesting discussion about the book Gift From the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh.
Join us in January! Pam Berg will be hosting and we’ll be discussing The Four Winds by Kristin Hannah.
Our upcoming reading list is:
Jan - The Four Winds by Kristin Hannah
Feb - Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra
March - James by Percival Everett
April - Tilt by Emma Pattee (LO Reads book)
Return to Table of Contents
|
|
'Tis the Season... for scams
Scams seem to be everywhere theses days. Here are some excellent tips for you, from the Attorney General of Washington. We also recommend this presentation from our own Tech expert, Mark Leavitt.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oH-EfVRw-bA
|
|
|
5 Common E-mail Scams
Though there are a thousand flavors of e-mail scams, the methods of detection are fairly straightforward. Here are five common types of scams and the clues you can use to spot them.
After reviewing these, you will have learned the skills you need to identify most e-mail scams on your own.
1) The Imitator
Many scams imitate legitimate companies in an effort to fool consumers. The simplest way to avoid these fakes is to never click on a link sent in an unsolicited e-mail. Find the company link on your own using a search engine, or, if you know the company address, type it in yourself.
In this example you receive a security advisory. No legitimate company is ever going to send you a Security Center Advisory in e-mail; That alone is enough to tell you it’s fake. But read on to spot more red flags.
Spot the Flaws:
- The sender is bogus. By hovering your mouse over the sender’s address (in this case they claim to be PayPal Security Center) you can see the real address in the lower left corner of the email. These scammers tried to make the address look like it belongs to PayPal, but the inclusion of intl. (short for international) before the PayPal is a dead giveaway. Why would an international division send you email? The second giveaway is the .inc (instead of .com).
- The sender would not know your name. "Dear valued member" is a dead giveaway that this is not a company you do business with.
- You won’t be notified of maintenance work. Sites manage maintenance seamlessly; at worst you will see a site is down when you try to go there. Sites do not randomly select who gets maintenance. You will never be asked to go through Identity verification in an e-mail.
- Hovering over “Click Here” shows the URL’s destination. As with issue #1, they attempt to look legitimate with https://www.paypal.com.row/pref-NOTI.
- Threats. The scam goes from apologizing for any inconvenience to threatening the recipient in an effort to scare you into responding. Companies are not going to threaten you and certainly won’t send threats in an e-mail that randomly selected you for maintenance.
- More embedded links. The scammer’s experience tells them that if there are many links you will be more likely to click on one of them. Another favorite ploy is for there to be a link to ‘unsubscribe’ from the email. While legitimate companies do have unsubscribe features, if you get this message in a scam, clicking the link will likely deliver malware to your computer.
____________
2) The Urgent Offer
Look at this offer for refinancing:
Spot the flaws:
- The offer is from a company you’ve never heard of. This is really the only identifier needed to know that this is fake. Legitimate companies don’t randomly spam consumers offering loans. The second clue is their e-mail address – with two @’s it does not match typical e-mail address format.
- The name of recipient isn’t yours. If the name on the To: line isn’t yours, then you’re one of the thousands (maybe millions) of names hidden on the Bcc: line.
- The email is urging you to make a financial transaction under time pressure. If you feel you have to act quickly, you are more likely to react without thoroughly investigating.
- You are singled out for an ‘exclusive’ opportunity. Ask yourself: why would a company you don’t know single you out?
- You are asked to enter financial information. They want you to enter financial information so they can instantly show you your adjusted mortgage rate. In fact, entering personal financial information on sites you aren’t absolutely sure are safe is almost sure to result in someone stealing from you.
- Increased urgency, more time pressure is applied. Notice that they can only guarantee this great rate ‘for three more days’, but no actual dates are given.
- Big lures on the page. In this case the big red button is designed to compel you to click. Who doesn’t want to calculate their savings? See #5.
- Hovering over “Click Here” shows the URL’s destination. When the scam is pretending to be a legitimate source – such as the IRS – the URL may look very similar to the legitimate site, but it actually is not the same.
When scammers create a fictitious company, creating a URL to match is easy, but if a scammer is pretending to be from a company you do business with and the URL given doesn’t match the company name you know, it’s fake. In this case the URL is http://besthome.de/index.htm. The ‘de’ extension is for Germany – it is unlikely that an American company would have a German URL.
Warning: Hover (Don’t click) or you will land on the malicious site.
- The phone number is listed to make you feel comfortable. Many people who are wary enough to not click on links, are fooled into calling the phone number listed. Scammers don’t care how they catch you: someone who sounds legitimate will be happy to scam you over the phone.
- Official looking ‘safety’ language. As with #8 above, never click on links to read a privacy policy.
- False address and phone numbers. Enter the listed address into a search engine rather than clicking the link and you will find there is no bank there. The phone number doesn’t list the area code, and it is not a toll-free number.
_______
3) The ‘Official Notice’
These scams attempt to fool consumers into believing they’ve received an e-mail that requires them to take some action. Often purporting to be from government agencies, these e-mails notify you of a problem. This example was sent in May, a time when people are more likely to believe an announcement is from the IRS. Here you’re supposed to be relieved that the IRS is acknowledging they received your payment, and then be anxious that there is a problem, and click without thinking.
Spot the flaws:
- The IRS does not send official notices via e-mail. This is really the only information you need to know this is fake, but there are several others as well…
- The sender address is service.irs.gov. The real IRS address is www.irs.gov
- The IRS would identify the recipient. This e-mail calls you a member. There are no members of the IRS.
- The IRS doesn’t send Security Messages.
- Hovering over “Click Here” shows the URL’s destination. This URL, http://www.vwu.at/Editor/assets, is definitely not an IRS site. Warning: Hover (don’t click) or you will land on the malicious site.
_______
4) The Lottery
Foreign lottery scams are rampant. If you did not enter a lottery, you did not win a lottery. If you did enter the lottery, you still are very unlikely to win, and you would not be notified via e-mail. This is a straightforward scam to get your information.
Spot the flaws:
- The sender is a person. No organization is going to send a notice from a personal e-mail, and they will use their organization’s e-mail, not a free e-mail service.
- No one is listed as the recipient. If your name isn’t on the To: line, it’s a scam. Also, no legitimate company will send you an e-mail with an incomprehensible subject line.
- The message is illiterate.
- The sender does not know your name.
- There is no such lottery. A simple Web search on the lottery name shows that it does not exist – and several results that say it is a scam. In addition, the idea that you are on an ‘exclusive list of 21,000 email addresses’ is absurd.
- If no tickets were sold, how does the lottery make money?
- Random jumbles of numbers designed to look impressive.
- You will never be asked to respond to an individual. If the organization is legitimate it will have its own e-mail address and you will be directed to customer support or another department, not a person.
- The information request. Collecting your information to sell to other criminals is the first goal. But if you respond with this information you will surely be asked for bank account and bank routing numbers as well so they can ‘deposit’ the money.
_______
5) The Survey
These scams rely on people’s desire to weigh in on issues and be heard on the issues of the day. In an election year one flavor is the voting survey, but any hot topic will do: global warming, attitudes towards war, the handling of the latest natural disaster, and so on.
Spot the flaws:
- If your e-mail service provider flags the e-mail as questionable, it probably is.
- The sender sounds official, until you look at the e-mail address. No legitimate organization is going to spam people with surveys – or send any e-mail from an address like w0m7hft2q5jy@myappreciatedbargain.com.
- The sender does not know your name.
- The e-mail asks you to ‘click here’ to download images. Simply clicking may result in the download of spyware or other malicious software to your computer.
Source: Washington State Office of the Attorney General; https://www.atg.wa.gov/5-common-e-mail-scams
* * * * * * * * *
|
|
|
|
WILLAMETTE RIVER POLAR PLUNGE
Plunge into the New Year with this cool community event! Enjoy a warm fire, warm food, and sweet treats before and after taking a quick refreshing dip in the Willamette River. This year they are partnering with Special Olympics Oregon. Come see people in costumes! Visit the Gin tasting booth! Enjoy food and warm fires! Fire fighters and EMTS standing by for any plungers requiring assistance.
* * * * * *
 Martin Luther King Day Celebration Sunday January 18th
Commemorate Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s life and teachings with a family-friendly celebration that features Katharine Phelps as emcee, a greeting from Mayor Joe Buck, a poetry reading by Emmett Wheatfall and musical performances by The Brown Sisters and Jaden Yazhari. Following the program, visit local non-profit booths to learn about community service opportunities, participate in a community art project with Lakewood Center for the Arts, and enjoy live music by LHS Jazz Ensemble.
Event Schedule: Sunday Jan 18th
2:00-3:00 pm - Program
3:00-4:00 pm - Community art project, non-profit tabling, live music by LHS Jazz Ensemble
The City is joined by partners from African American Women of Lake Oswego and Surrounding Areas, Bahá’ís of Lake Oswego, LO for LOve, Lake Oswego School District, Lakewood Center for the Arts, Mary’s Woods, and Respond to Racism for this event. This event is sponsored by the City of Lake Oswego, the Friends of the Lake Oswego Public Library, and Lake Oswego School District.
This event will take place at the Lakeridge Middle School, located at 4700 Jean Road in Lake Oswego. Admission is free, and ASL interpretation will be provided. A livestream of this event will be available at: www.youtube.com/@lakeoswegopubliclibrary(link is external) . For additional information, please contact Nancy Niland at 503-675-2538 or nniland@lakeoswego.city
*********
Share your life stories with an interested teen! Sages and Seekers is an intergenerational program that fosters meaningful connections between Sages (adults 60+) and Seekers (students ages 14-24) to diminish ageism, combat social isolation, and build empathy between generations. They are looking for older adults to join this 7-week program, meeting once a week for 60 minutes beginning in mid-January. This program is an opportunity to share your life experience with an interested listener and rediscover a sense of purpose. By sharing your story, students gain a deeper appreciation for older adults and the legacies they carry. Together, both generations discover common ground and break down stereotypes about one another.
Watch this video to learn more.
https://vimeo.com/838879469
Watch this video to learn more.
To enroll in the program,
visit https://sagesandseekers.org/
Questions? Contact Susana at susana@sagesandseekers.org.
Return to Table of Contents
|
|
TERRY'S EARTH FRIENDLY TIPS
|
|
|
 Tis the Season (to take a break)
By
Terence M. Shumaker
shufly46@comcast.net
Terry is taking a break this month! Look for a new article next month.
WLLO RECYCLING COLLECTION SCHEDULE
Remember, we pick up plastic film, (no crinkly plastic film), and all clean clear #1 PET and PETE plastics. Please, no black or colored #1 plastic.
If you have a question about something you want to recycle, and it’s something your WLLO Recycle Team picks up, please contact the appropriate recipient given below. Their list of items they accept change regularly. Thanks for your help.
PLEASE REMEMBER: We can no longer accept #6 PS or Styrofoam plastics.
2026 - January 13: Furniture, linens, dishes (no chips or cracks or alcohol-themed items), kitchen utensils, mattresses/box springs, small appliances (in working condition), decorative items and artwork, rugs etc. Items are donated to the Community Warehouse. https://www.communitywarehouse.org/give-furniture/
March 10: Building materials, tools, plumbing and lighting fixtures, fasteners etc. The Rebuilding Center breathes new life into these items. https://www.rebuildingcenter.org/donations
May 12: Cleaners, pesticides, chemicals, light bulbs, smoke alarms, paint, batteries and other hazardous materials. Metro South Hazardous Waste site reclaims and recycles.
https://www.oregonmetro.gov/tools-living/garbage-and-recycling/garbage-recycling-hazardous-waste-disposal-oregon-city
July 14: Electronics and everything with a power cord. PLEASE: NO LIGHT BULBS OR SMOKE DETECTORS! But LED light bulbs are ok! Free Geek rehabilitates and recycles this stuff. Please wrap up cords and cables and secure with a twist tie or rubber band.
https://www.freegeek.org/take-action/donate-technology
|
|
|
WLLO & Villages Events
Check out our calendar on our website homepage. It's easier to read, you can change how information is displayed and the calendar is also printable.
- Also be sure to check your Week-At-A-Glance email. Members and Volunteers receive Week-At-A-Glance emails every Sunday with detailed information for the upcoming week.
- Summary of Regularly Scheduled Events:
- Ted Talk Discussion Group - Monday 11:00 AM
- Book Club 2nd Tuesday at 10:30
- Brisk Walk Wednesdays at 9:00 AM
- Chat and Stroll Wednesdays at 10:00 AM
- Chat and Craft 2nd and 4th Wednesdays at 10:30
- 2nd Thursday of the month - Happy Hour in person at 4 PM
- The 3rd and Last Friday - Coffee in person at 10:00 AM or 2:00 PM
- One Friday of each month - Coffee Hour on Zoom at 9:00 AM. Watch Week at a Glance for date.
- For registration, calendar questions, or log-in help, contact the WLLO office (503-308-8223). To get log in details to specific events, email info@WLLOvillage.org. (Many events are for members and volunteers only.)
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|